Every time I sign in to Facebook it asks, "what's on my mind?" My answer is rarely short enough to fit in the status box provided. This blog is a collection of my random thoughts and reflections that answers that question.

Friday, July 27, 2012

Swimming Pool, Lake, River?


I grew up swimming in a lake, entering either at the town park or off of my parents’ boat. I have memories of playing in the sand at the beach; digging holes and building castles, but as far as the water goes I mostly remember having little fish nibble at my toes. I enjoyed spending time on the lake onboard the boat. Swimming off of it was even fun, or tubing or being with my dad in a raft paddling off the boat. Mostly I spent hot summer days swimming in friends’ pools. This was much more enjoyable for me, no fish, no water plants and I could see the bottom.

I now live along the Mississippi River (my town, not my house). Although I think the river is beautiful in its own “Big Muddy” kind of way the idea of swimming in it or another river in town that has a town beach does not appeal to me at all. I’ve been to both beaches a few times for the sake of my children, but I rarely get wet up to my shoulders. I take them for the lure of the sand. I much prefer to spending hot summer days at our city’s pool with a zero depth entrance, two water slides and a few other water attractions.

Last summer my in-laws gave us a great inflatable pool for our backyard (8’ x 4’ – totally guessing). It wasn’t inflated this summer (which I swear began in March this year) until my husband suggested it. Although the kids have enjoyed it, as has my husband, and myself too on a few occasions, I am still drawn to the city pool. Our pool has been emptied and refilled once or twice this year. Two days I took a look at it and to my utter disgust the bottom was covered in algae! Yuck! I began draining it, which soon proved to be a bigger job than I had the patience for, so, my one chore for today was to clean it. I went outside, began draining it and all I could think of was how I never swam in ponds. Then I thought about the lake I swam in as a child and I remembered preferring to swim in pools. Then I watched the water I was draining turn to green and watched it run over my feet with a disgusted expression on my face.

The pool is now empty, I used the hose to spray some algae out (much less came off than I had hoped), then I began scrubbing the algae out with rags. Of course, that also didn’t go as easily has I had hoped. So, for now the pool is in the driveway in hopes that the underside, where there is no algae, will dry. I scrubbed for as long as I could stomach. Between a child throwing up this morning and scrubbing algae I have successfully lost my afternoon appetite.

When my husband (then boyfriend) has a fish tank with three large fish my favorite was the plecostomus, the algae eater. If only one could be put in my pool, when my toes weren’t in it.

As I type this, the rags are in my new washing machine on the “sanitize” setting and I wish I could put myself in there with them.

That house down the street that I sometimes fantasize about living in one day, the one with the above ground pool, I think would look great with a fifteen-foot (another total guess) round garden with a deck attached.


Thursday, July 26, 2012

Humor in Tragedy


“Laughter is the best medicine” is one of my favorite clichés, definitely more than “Time will heal all wounds”. Humor has helped me through many challenging times, mostly through my mom’s cancer and her subsequent death.

I’ve read several articles about the tragedy in the Denver movie theater. It was a horrific event. However, it has left me with a few thoughts that bring laughter during a time when it is needed most…during tragedy.

I hope this does not lead to metal detectors or the checking of bags at movie theaters. I’ll never be able to sneak another bottle of water in again.

I read that several people in the theater thought that the shooting was part of the movie, because it began during a violent movie scene. I went to see Magic Mike last night and kept waiting for the real stripper to enter through an exit door.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Signs?


Before my mom passed away, but after she was diagnosed with lung cancer I asked her to give me a sign after she died. Almost to my surprise she responded with, “If that was possible don’t you think someone would have done it already?” I was surprised only because I thought my mom believed in signs and to an extent she did, as do I.

My mom raised me to tell her the truth, to share my opinions openly no matter how harsh they may be. We ruffled each other’s feathers daily when I was a teenager and even after. But we communicated and respected each other. I could tell her just about anything I chose to.

So it is because of that that I sit here on my couch with tears streaming down my face at 11:30 pm three years after she died. I had just finished posting my last blog entry, “Who is Family?” when my cat started slowly approaching my back door. As I looked (because I trust her instincts, especially when we’re the only two awake in the house) I saw a small white thing at my door. Before I freaked out I walked very slowly over to her to see what type of animal it was. Several years ago it was common to see a black cat out that door. To my utter surprise it was a frog hanging out on my door! Let me just say in eleven years I have never experienced this. We have found several frogs (none this year though) in our window well and one once startled me by hanging out in a houseplant I put outside for the summer, noticing it only when I went to carry the plant in for the fall/winter and was eye to eye to it.



Just the other day my daughter and I were looking at photos when she drew my attention to a photo I had taken in Florida of a frog hanging out on my mom’s car window. My mom had many toads and frogs around her house, they could regularly be found on doors, in “toad houses” she placed in gardens, on her porch, almost anywhere you looked. I was sure to be startled by one on nearly every visit.

The tears have stopped, but as I sit here I can’t help but think this frog is a sign. After posting my last entry I thought of other things to add to it, but at the same time I’ve sat here for a few minutes speculating if my blog was the right place to express those feelings. Thinking that maybe my personal journal would have been more appropriate. Is this frog a sign from my mom saying, “It’s done, don’t worry about it. You were just being honest. If someone reads it and they don’t like, oh well”.

Signs are what we make them and I thank this little frog for hanging out with me as I write this.

Sunday, July 22, 2012

Who is Family?




Who is Family?

This entry includes my thoughts about what makes up a family that have jumbled and bounced around in my brain for years. I am writing with honesty and have no intentions to offend anyone. I’m not sure if when you are done reading this you will be confused, be able to relate to me, or just shake your head. Whatever you are feeling I thank you for reading this with an open mind and for not judging me based on the ramblings of this entry.

What makes someone a part of your family? Is it limited to those who you are blood related to? I think not. After all, those who are adopted or who adopt would strongly disagree. But adoptive families aside. If families are made up people whom you share memories with and love you for who you are, those who love you unconditionally, those who best understand you I would have to strongly disagree.

For me, I am fortunate to have some relatives who I would choose to be my family, those who I would choose to be friends with even if we didn’t meet through birth. There are also others who live their life and think so differently than me I am convinced that if we didn’t share DNA our paths would never cross.

Then there are loved ones we meet through marriage whose senses of humors, political views, and upbringings are so different than our own we wonder how their children grew up to be the perfect partner for us and parent to our children.

I have friends who have been promoted to the “better than family” status because we care about each other and love each other’s children as if they were “family”, but without the obligation, therefore choosing to be there for each other when we need help and support.

I have friends who are sisters and brothers, uncles and grandparents to my children. And I have known them no more than twelve of my thirty-six and a half years at best.

There are friends I can talk to about anything, who will listen with their heart and I have family who I can’t carry on a meaningful conversation with.

I have family whose kids I’ve never met or them mine. I have friends whose kids I only get to see once a year, but know they will be a part of my life because their moms are my “sisters”.

I have friends who send my children gifts and family who don’t even call on their birthdays.

I have family who keep secrets from each other and friends who I share nearly everything with.

I have family who are terrible listeners and friends who listen sincerely.

I have friends who I wish I could buy plane tickets for to come visit me, and family who I haven’t visited in years and have no plans to see.

I have family I choose to live several states away from and friends who I wish on a daily basis lived closer.

I have friends who I don’t talk with for months or over a year, but pick up right where we left off when we do speak or see each other. And family who I speak to regularly but have nothing to talk about.

I have family who I find no humor in and friends who I am guaranteed to laugh until I cry with during each and every visit, whether it’s weekly or yearly.

I have family who will never read this blog because it does not interest them, or they “don’t read” or maybe because they’re not interested in me and I have friends who “subscribe” to it.

I have a cousin who is more like a sister and a sister who is more like a distant cousin.

I am thankful for the people who are actively in my life and know that those who are not, my friends would say are missing out.

Most importantly, I own the fact that I choose between who is a part of my life and who is apart from my life. I am in awe of myself and the strength I have developed to make this decision, basing on my personal happiness, and my well-being, both emotionally and physically. I also know that in a relationship it takes both people to want to include each other. Surrounding myself with sincerely positive and respectful people who have similar lifestyles adds such peace to my life, I recommend it to everyone!

It is sometimes difficult to write with pure honesty not knowing exactly all who read my blog, but these thoughts have been screaming to get out of my head.


Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Monarch Mishaps



For the past few years I have wanted to raise a Monarch caterpillar with my kids and watch its transformation to a beautiful butterfly. This “want” never resulted into finding a caterpillar or even inquiring where I could find one. This year one fell right into my lap, well not literally, but it might as well have when one of my son’s classmates asked us if we wanted one. I answered, “YES!” faster than my son heard the question.

Over the weekend in between when we signed the adoption papers and the caterpillar’s arrival we searched and found milkweed, the main criteria for keeping it alive. We set up a container and then in just a day after bringing our baby home it got into its ready position of a “J” to start it’s chrysalis. Two days later we confirmed it dead as its body flattened, blackened and no chrysalis was formed.


Upon hearing of our loss the mom offered us a chrysalis. They had three and would give it to us in a jar, already formed and nothing we could do could kill it she assured us. Although she did say it could take weeks, so we should be patient. Unfortunately we missed the phase when it changed from a bright green chrysalis to transparent, because less than two days later we had a beautiful male butterfly. We knew it was male because of two black dots/spots on its wings. It flew from the jar lid when we weren’t looking, but thankfully our cat helped us locate it. We each held it on our finger before releasing it.
 

On a related note, if you’ve never read “Adios, Oscar” by Peter Elwell I would highly recommend this great picture book! 





Saturday, June 30, 2012

Slowdown and Enjoy the Summer


Feeling on top of the world, okay town, with my kids. 

“Summer is going by so fast.”

I can’t agree with this statement, not to mention most of the people who have said this to me have added something like, I can’t believe it’s already June 24 (when it’s really only June 23) or I can’t believe it already July (it’s not it’s only June 28). I just want to shout, “Slow down people!”

Maybe this is the first time I can’t agree with this feeling and I think it’s simple. I’m enjoying every moment and every day. I honestly think I’ve been good at doing this since my kids were born. My secret? Every now and then I stop and stand back from the moment (sometimes literally, sometimes it just resembles me pressing the imaginary pause button on my nose) and just LOOK at what is before me. Yesterday it was capturing my children’s faces full of excitement and fun during a trip to a waterpark.

It may also be because this summer we have no big trips plan. There’s no focusing on weeks and months ahead of time, there’s no, we leave in two weeks, or in one month we’ll be in…

So, you’re summer may be going by too fast, but over here I’m just livin’ the life savoring my summer one moment at a time.

It’s taking the cliché, “Stop and smell the roses,” to heart. You should try it some time.


Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Baking and Blogging


I’ve been in a blogging funk lately. I continue to blog in my head daily, but few end up being typed and shared. I’m attempting to spend less time on my computer now that summer has arrived (read: school is out!). 

I’ve thought about sharing recipes with you that I’ve found on other blogs (a new hobby of mine) and have baked. As a result I’ve gotten into the habit of photographing my baking. Today I will share with you not a recipe I found, but one I was given years ago that has become a constant in my kitchen, especially during my annual Christmas/Hanukkah baking.

This was the first delivery of my cookies to the person who won a year of my cookies at the Blue Ribbon Ball. There’s got to be a shorter way to describe that experience and the year of baking and delivery in my future. Any ideas?



Michele’s Cream Cheese Spritz Cookies
2 ½ cups flour
1 cup sugar
1 egg
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3 oz. packed cream cheese
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter
½ teaspoon salt


1. Cream butter and cream cheese.

2. Add egg, sugar and vanilla until well blended.

3. Slowly add flour and salt. Mix well.

4. Add food coloring if desired.

Using a cookie press, place cookie son your cookie sheet. Bake at 350 degrees for 10-12 minutes. Do not brown. Cookies should be soft and look creamy in color. 

Two dozen cookies for the lucky Parenting Place supporter.